Throughout our premarital counseling sessions, our pastor asked each of us why we love each other. Each week, we were expected to give a new response. I think that it is wise to find some level of commonality before going into a marriage, particularly in the values of most importance such as faith. The purest form of love, however, is never deserved. Love that is earned is cheap; love that is undeserved is invaluable. Only God is capable of such pure love. He loves us, not because of any intrinsic value we have, but simply because He chooses to. God doesn't love me because I have value; I have value because God loves me. To claim to love someone else in this same way almost sounds insulting. "I love you because I choose to" doesn't sound too flattering when said to another human being. But even if we make outward claims of love wrapped in compliments, the root of our love should stem from an unwavering commitment. I love my wife because I made a commitment to love her for my entire life. I love my neighbor because God commands me to and I made a commitment to obey His commands. As soon as we base our love on how we are treated or the value we perceive someone offers, our love becomes cheap and fikkle.